July 4, 2008

Dear Friends and Family,

Well this is my first update and I’m not sure what to write.  My ego wants me to fulfill its teacher identity, then there's the Spiritual Identity. Martyr, victim and sufferer keep popping up too. But the truth is I'm not resisting or compelled by any or all of them. I feel too much like crap to let them run me.

This will be short; my energy seems to diminish quickly.

The cards and messages on the “Friends of Matt” site have been overwhelming and are exactly what is needed, so, thanks so much.

I began my treatment on June 14^th.  It involves a weekly regimen of drugs whose side effects are pretty debilitating.  Each day Gregg helps get me from the bed to the sofa.  He then gets my meals and is keeping good records of any changes in health.  This is no cake walk.  I can sit up on my own for maybe 15 minutes, and then I can no longer hold my body up. I hate to admit it, but a walker may be needed soon. YIKES!!

For those of you who have offered to make meals and help keep the house in some order, Gregg may be calling you soon. He is doing it all and working 2 jobs. He is remarkable -- loving, tender, nurturing and always there.

Many of you pass through my consciousness each day. I read your messages, think of so many of you, and all the irreversible miracles and new relationships that have occurred for thousands and thousands of us since 1982 when I first started yakin about the mission, purpose and ministry. And through the years, all of you have shown up, for distinct, unique and precise purposes; what a miracle.
 
I'm thinking of you.  God has me in the palm of Her hands. When you pray for me, please visualize me as physically pain free; I can use some help in that area. This hurts. . .

Blissings,
Matt